Tools
Everyone wants to know how to build a good life. The good news is you already have all of the tools required. These posts are a reminder, a wake up, and a bit of a new take.
The Tools in the Good Life Tool Box: An Introduction
Nine out of ten times, when I ask couples why they are coming to therapy, they say something like, "We want to learn better communication tools". And nine out of ten times when I ask people who are feeling depressed why they are coming to therapy, they say some...
Featured Post
The Tools in the Good Life Tool Box: An Introduction
Nine out of ten times, when I ask couples why they are coming to therapy, they say something like, "We want to learn better communication tools". And nine out of ten times when I ask people who are feeling depressed why they are coming to therapy, they say some...
Draw for “The Tools” Webpage! (or get your kids to on a rainy afternoon)
Hey Artists and Makers, Do you like to draw or paint? Do you have an image in your head of "The Bird Feeder of Grace"? Or "The Back Pocket of Knowledge"? How about "The Cradle of Compassion"? If so - or if you think others you know might -...
Tool #1: The Cradle of Compassion, Pt. 1
Compassion is the most important virtue, it is the outgrowth of Grace and the precursor to Love. It is impossible to kill someone with Compassion and Compassion cannot put you in the poor house. Compassion, I assure you, will never leave your heart broken. This is...
The Cradle of Compassion Pt. 2
Compassion is like holding a baby. You don’t always need to feel compassionate, but nothing feels as good as holding a baby when we know we don’t always need to hold the baby!
Tool # 2: The Pipe Cleaner of Creativity
The Tools of Good Living can be taught. Creativity, like Pipe Cleaners, is flexible, colourful, and cheap to come by. It also liberates you.
Tool # 3: The Bird Feeder of Grace
Grace. It is rather difficult to talk about Grace as a thing, a tool. Particularly as there is nothing transactional about Grace, and you can't earn it or become undeserving of it. Grace what we exhibit when we choose to give others (or ourselves) the benefit of the...
Tool #4: The License Plate of Responsibility, pt. 1
What is a license plate but a tool for telling the world "Here I am. I'm covered. I'll do my best, and if something goes south, I'm accountable". This relates to our emotional, spiritual, and psychological worlds, too: We all carry ourselves a bit better when it's...
Tool #5: The Kleenex Wad of Resilience
Resiliance is not just taking the blow, but healing from it. And getting stronger because of it. Any athlete whose mom has shoved a wad of kleenex up her nose to stop a nose bleed in the middle of the game, knows this. The message: Avoid harm but keep a Kleenex ready, just-in-case.
Tool # 6: The Combination Lock of Humility
The Combination to Humility: Accept, Reflect, Own. This will unlock you from defensiveness.
Tool #7: The Pool Cue of Cause and Effect
I've been writing this essay all morning now, and I think I've only just figured out where I want to begin. You see, I've been struggling with the coldness of the "Pool Cue" metaphor. When it comes up in session, I can say it with a smile, but like a lot of useful...
Tool #8: The Back Pocket of Knowledge
Having knowledge helps us know where we are, where we’re going, and gives our life meaning (even when we’re sad). Besides, in knowledge are solutions for bad driving, losing things, and anxiousness in the wee hours of the morning.
Tool #8 Part 2: The Back Pocket of Knowledge, Night Time Edition
It is easier for some people – including me – to worry than not to worry. The good news is, even if you have been a worrier, you can get some of the power back by recognizing that you are worrying and pivoting your thoughts to ready-made things you are interested in.