THE TOOLS: AN INTRODUCTION
“Courage, my friends; ’tis not too late to build a better world.”
– Tommy Douglas
Almost everyone coming into therapy says, “I want to learn better communication tools!” But what exactly are these tools? What tools help us respond well-enough when we’re feeling low, let alone in times of crisis? These posts propose that seemingly magical virtues like Compassion, Grace, and Balanced Communication are innate to you, AND that you must nurture, protect, and practice using them if you want them to shine through in your day-to-day life.
Another thing you may notice about these posts is that they give a clarifying frame to reality so we can do two very different things simultaneously. Firstly, we can use our emotions to help our decision making (whoa!). Secondly, having done that, we can see more clearly what our choices are. Once we’ve decided what matters and learned how to focus on that, and do so with humility, creativity, and kindness, well, that’s liberation.
This is not to say that all of the tools feel as good, warm, and cuddly as Compassion and Grace. After all, life can be gross and painful and sometimes you end up with a sore nose and an iron taste in your mouth. A couple of the tools reflect the grittiness of life. (I promise those are G rated, too). The Kleenex wad of Resilience is certainly not a pretty image! Yet, if Resilience is anything, it’s the ability to keep performing even when you’ve taken an elbow to the face.
Though this is not a self-help blog in the traditional sense, it will at times challenge you to think in new ways. Using The Tools requires ‘lateral thinking’ so, you’ll need an open mind and a spirit of play. It might seem absurd to call a cradle (or a wad of Kleenex) a “tool”, nevertheless, I’m going to ask that you roll with me on some of these. And, of course, I’m hoping you’re inspired to dream up your own tools to add to the tool box. –– Make ’em yours!